Ein Thread, viel zu lesen und (mittlerweile) 5 Witze. ;)

Wenn von den Geschichten auch nur 10% Real wären, würde ich echt Angst haben.
Aber lustig sind sie Trotzdem.

LgTrommelmann

Zum Thema "real":
Was trennt 3 Alkoholiker von 4 Nymphomaninnen?

...die Cockpittür....

Hotel Alpha Lima Lima Ohio,

gut, dass die Witze aus den einschlägigen Gazetten der Hobbyflieger sind.
Das Alter merkt man Einigen auch an. Wer ist denn der dritte Alkoholiker im Cockpit? Der Autopilot?

Nein, man braucht keine Angst zu haben.
Ein Pilot stirbt wie ein Mann.

Good Day,
Juliett Uniform Romeo Golf Echo November

Edith meldet Steinberger.

Zitat

Pilot: "...Tower, please call me a fuel truck."
Tower: "Roger. You are a fuel truck."

Ich schmeiß mich weg... Ich weiß schon, warum ich auch mal fliegen lernen will...

Noch was aus meinem Archiv...

Transcript of the New Answering Service Recently Installed at The Mental Health Institute.

Hello, and welcome to the Mental Health Hotline: -

If you are obsessive-compulsive - Press 1 repeatedly.

If you are co-dependent - Please ask someone to press 2 for you.

If you have multiple personalities - Press 3, 4, 5 and 6.

If you are paranoid - We know who you are and what you want, stay on the line so we can trace your call.

If you are delusional - Press 7 and your call will be transferred to the Mother Ship orbiting around Alpha Centuri.

If you are schizophrenic - Listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which number to press.

If you are a manic-depressive - It doesn't matter which number you press, no-one will answer.

If you are dyslexic - Press 9696969696969.

If you have a nervous disorder - Please fidget with the hash key until a representative comes on the line.

If you have amnesia - Press 8 and state your name, address, phone number, date, time and place of birth, national insurance number and your mother's maiden name.

If you have post-traumatic stress disorder - Slowly and carefully press 000.

If you have bi-polar disorder - Please leave a message after the beep or before the beep or after the beep. Please wait for the beep.

If you have short-term memory loss - Press 9
If you have short-term memory loss - Press 9.
If you have short-term memory loss - Press 9.
If you have short-term memory loss - Press 9.

If you have low self-esteem - Please hang up, all our operators are too busy to talk to you.

A phone exchange between a hotel guest and room-service, at a hotel in Asia,
which was recorded and published in the Far East Economic Review:

Room Service: "Morny. Ruin sorbees"

Guest: "Sorry, I thought I dialed room-service"

Room Service: "Rye..Ruin sorbees..morny! Djewish to oder sunteen??"

Guest: "Uh..yes..I'd like some bacon and eggs"

Room Service: "Ow July den?"

Guest: "What??"

Room Service: "Ow July den?...pry, boy, pooch?"

Guest: "Oh, the eggs! How do I like them? Sorry, scrambled please."

Room Service: "Ow July dee bayhcem...crease?"

Guest: "Crisp will be fine"

Room Service: "Hokay. An San toes?"

Guest: "What?"

Room Service: "San toes. July San toes?"

Guest: "I don't think so"

Room Service: "No? Judo one toes??"

Guest: "I feel really bad about this, but I don't know what 'judo one toes' means."

Room Service: "Toes! toes!...why djew Don Juan toes?
Ow bow singlish mopping we bother?"

Guest: "English muffin!! I've got it! You were saying 'Toast.' Fine.
Yes. An English muffin will be fine."

Room Service: "We bother?"

Guest: "No..just put the bother on the side."

Room Service: "Wad?"

Guest: "I mean butter...just put it on the side."

Room Service: "Copy?"

Guest: "Sorry?"

Room Service: "Copy...tea...mill?"

Guest: "Yes. Coffee please, and that's all."

Room Service: "One Minnie. Ass ruin torino fee, strangle ache,
crease, baychem, tossy singlish mopping we bother honey sigh, and copy....rye??"

Guest: "Whatever you say"

Room Service: "Tendjewberrymud"

Guest: "You're welcome"

Damit es noch besser wird, laut lesen ... viel Spass damit.

Der Room Service hat mich doch glatt an einen französischen Reporter erinnert, der versucht hat englisch zu sprechen. Der Rest ist natürlich auch klasse

Erinnert mich ein bisschen an einen Rastafari.

Bumbaclot Babylon is in search fi I and I.
Wha' g'wan me bredren?

Weils sooogut dazupasst

http://de.youtube.com/watch?v=tsAfgMUHApU

Danke!

Oder mal so was: http://de.youtube.com/watch?v=sdYVXC8Ti7g

Ein wenig läbsch, aber nach nem After-Work-Beer erheiternd.

der spricht doch akzentfrei - weiß gar nicht was du hast

Hat hört sich eher an die "Simsisch"

Hehe
Für alle Nichtwisser:

"Die Sims" ist ein Computerspiel mit erfundener Sprachausgabe.

Kostprobe: http://youtube.com/watch?v=GjIXK_nqhWQ&feature=related

Nachschlag: http://youtube.com/watch?v=6UBTjrBFzDI&feature=user

Zitat von dimmun

Weils sooogut dazupasst

http://de.youtube.com/watch?v=tsAfgMUHApU

Sehr gut ;-))))))

"Do you have a meat room? We want to hold meat."

Den hier kennen bestimmt die meisten schon, aber immer wieder gut

http://de.youtube.com/watch?v=m1TnzCiUSI0

danke didi, kannte ich noch nicht. wegrofl.

in diesem sinne: äähhh, waiter, can i become a beefsteak, please?

Super didi, ich kannte den auch noch nicht.

Peace on You!